i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Randomize
