Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
Randomize
