you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
Randomize
