i permit you to call me
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
