That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
Randomize
