So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
Randomize
