Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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