dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
Slut skills are useful in every country.
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
Randomize
