I want to make a zoo with you.
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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