I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
Randomize
