"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
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