Swine flu. Run for my life!
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
you win again, gameday.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
Randomize
