you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
