Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
This is getting exciting. I almost wanna turn off all the lights, get some popcorn, and stare at my phone screen to see if she's going to say yes or not
And on a much sadder note, I'm way to drunk for this right now
Randomize