The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
Randomize
