doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
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