You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
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