There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize
