I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
it's like that moment that you're driving and realize you're lost except instead of driving i'm just sitting here in my living room drunk, eating a plate of sausages, drinking red wine and just thinking "i'm going to be 28 this year. i know people who are married, with beautiful and well behaved children. where was the wrong turn?"
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Randomize
