I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
Randomize
