Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
Randomize
