I thought I drunk dialed Adam last night and left him a voicemail. I just checked my phone. I realize I left a drunk voicemail with my son's teacher.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
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