I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
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