i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize
