Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
Ever since I got married, I've become the MacGuyver of masturbation
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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