his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
Even my vagina gasped.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Randomize
