im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
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