I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
Did you put 9lbs of birdseed all over my car?
You weighed it?
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
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