I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Randomize
