Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize
