Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
