is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
Randomize