Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
Randomize
