I molested 6 butterflies tonight
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
Randomize
