The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
Randomize
