can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
Randomize
