I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
Randomize
