hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
Randomize
