Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
