People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
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