Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
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