belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
Randomize
