yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
