Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
This beer is not sobering me up at all
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
Randomize
