That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
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