he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
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