It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
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