We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Randomize