lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
