i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Randomize
