i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
Randomize
